If you read my last blog post, I attached an article that outlined several lies divorced parents say. I've had heard them all. They were also told to me out of comfort in the months following my divorce. I do believe kids benefit from living with both parents under the same household. As a parent I didn't sign up to miss out on Christmas morning, or "not" have my child on their birthday. Some people truly don't care about that, it breaks my heart everytime. It always will, but we've adjusted, modified, as well as lost a bit of the excitement these holidays use to bring.
Ok, enough about that side. Sometimes divorce happens, actually 50% of the time. So for those of us that do find ourselves single parenting, there truly is a plus side too. On the top of my list is getting to parent the way I want to. I raise my children the exact way I want with very little influence from the other parent. Everyday my focus is on my kids, only one day everyother week I don't see them, meaning nearly each day is ours. I am IT for getting my children to and from everything (at least I was until my son got his license), that's a lot of together time that would typically be split between parents. We no longer have to walk on eggshells in our own house to not agitate someone else if we are too messy that day, or leave our shoes out by the door (maybe several pairs) instead of taking them to our room. We make dinner when we want and if it's been too busy we grab something to go, settle in downstairs and pick a movie (lots of girly ones)! We don't have to ask permission to travel. My children and I have seen more of the US and the world than we ever did with my ex husband, because now we just do it.
Aside from the parenting, I have an independence I didn't even know I desired. I am more confident. Having a lot less time and flexibility in my day I'm more sure now of the ways and with who I want to spend my free time. I don't waste my time doing things I don't want to anymore. My priorities are much more solid. I take the time to really take in each day and appreciate it. I make goals for my future. I've been able to fall in love with someone that reciprocates it in actions not just words. I became a solo home owner, buying my ex out last year, something I am immensely proud of.
Life is an ebb and flow, a give and take. There's the negative, but there is always the positive.
The appreciation to live this life with these two is at the top of it.
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